I have always had a struggle with forgiveness. I know this very well. I forgive up until the point of understanding… But when I no longer understand, it would have been a hard fought battle if I managed to forgive.

We are forewarned. 1The Word of God says that Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy. He comes to steal the promises and blessings of God from your life. He is determined to kill your faith and joy. And he won’t be satisfied until he has destroyed your relationships on three levels –  with God, with yourself (your self-esteem), and with other people. This crafty, devious troublemaker revels in our blind spots, and dances a delighted jig when we crash. He leaves us lying in the debris of our shattered hopes and dreams, mad at God, mad at ourselves, and bitter toward others. Satan knows our blind spots very well. He is aware of my need for approval, my need of belonging, my need to understand, and my need for an apology or at least a humble acknowledgement of a fault. These things I am very much content that, by the grace of God, I am aware of now – my blind spots, and I’m slowly trying to detach myself from these so called ‘needs.’ I would like to be able to forgive freely and lovingly, and not let these ‘needs’ stand in the way so that I won’t have to take so long to make a choice to love.

Acceptance is humbling, and surrender means trusting in the Lord that difficulties are placed on your path not as punishment for your sins but for the purification of your soul, so that you may come a few steps closer to Christ and the Father with the help of the Holy Spirit. God is a Loving God, and I am a loving follower. This I claim in Jesus’ name. Again, I forgive. 70 x 7.

2I forgive the tears that I was made to shed,
I forgive the pain and the disappointments,
I forgive the betrayals and the lies,
I forgive the slanders and intrigues,
I forgive the hatred and the persecution,
I forgive the blows that hurt me,
I forgive the wrecked dreams,
I forgive the stillborn hopes,
I forgive the hostility and jealousy,
I forgive the indifference and ill will,
I forgive the injustice carried out in the name of justice,
I forgive the anger and the cruelty,
I forgive the neglect and the contempt,
I forgive the world and all its evils… 

I will be capable of loving, regardless of whether I am loved in return,
Of giving, even when I have nothing,
Of working happily, even in the midst of difficulties,
Of holding out my hand, even when utterly alone and abandoned,
Of drying my tears, even while I weep,
Of believing, even when no one believes in me.

1. Michelle McKinney Hammond, What To Do Until Love Finds You
2. Aleph, Paulo Coelho


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